The thing I love most about this hot weather is the short skirts
and low cut tops....
although, they do make me look a bit gay.
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Following the tragic death of the Human Cannonball at the Traveling Circus,
a spokesman said "We'll have to get another man of the same caliber."
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Just been to the gym. They've got a new machine in.
Could only use it for half an hour, as I started to feel sick
It's great though. It provides me with everything i need -
KitKats, Mars Bars, Snickers, Potato Chips, the lot.."
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My girlfriend says she thinks that I might be a stalker.
Well... she's not exactly my girlfriend yet.
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A wife says to her husband
"You're always pushing me around and talking behind my back."
And he says "What do you expect? You're in a wheelchair!"
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I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated
but must come back as a different creature.
She said she would like to come back as a cow.
I said, "You obviously haven't been listening."
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My wife has been missing a week now.
The police said to prepare for the worst.
So, I went down to the Smith Family to get all of her clothes back.
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one liners
Moderator: Moderators
- looseplucker
- Posts: 1558
- Joined: Tue Jan 02, 2007 10:32 am
- Location: Canberra
one liners
Are you well informed or is your news limited?
- Bent Stick
- Posts: 414
- Joined: Sun Jul 26, 2009 9:06 pm
- Location: Sunshine Coast
Re: one liners
If your not having fun, your doing it for all the wrong reasons